"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind." (James,1:5-8)

God knocked me for six at church this morning and brought me crashing to my knees in repentence for my self sufficeincy and my anxiety over the future rather than asking for wisdom from the One who's very essence is The Giver.

And being the Giver he gave words to the vicars wife as she prayed for me that were so spot on what I needed to hear. Not necessarily what I wanted to hear; ie what I'm suppsed to do, but beauitful words of encouragement to not fear making wrong choices, to not be anxious, to take steps of faith. That God will use me and my gifts in whatever I choose to do.

It's painful when the shutters rise and I realise how I've been putting barriers up to hearing God through the idol of anxiety. Repentence is hard, but God is so gracious and loves to give generously of his wisdom and of his peace.