see how transparent they are... for more than shells

Saturday 5 May 2007

a bit of a journey

Well, It's over...My three years at Goldsmiths college have come to an end. whilst I am so pleased all the work is done, I am gutted. I have absolutely loved being at Goldsmiths, I have loved being a student. Even in the bleakest days I have never wanted it to be over or wanted to leave. I think that might be rare.

God has been so good, so faithful and so pateint these last 3 years. I can also say the same for Pod for this last term, though that might liken him to God and...er..yeah...anyway...

It seems like such a long time ago I moved into halls in New Cross, age 20. Even for that I am so grateful to God that I wasnt there at 18. In everything over the 3 years I can see God's hand leading and guiding, teaching and discipling, loving, caring, encouraging.

For the huge influence UCCF has had over the time here both through being part of CU, leading CU, loving CU - it being my family, and 121s with Esther Chilvers and Anna Mac, for Bib evang, Forum, Student Council, and just a big baptism in grace. Grace extended to me, grace taught to me, grace in it's application to all areas of life. Grace freeing me to enjoy all the good things God has given me. A freedom.

For some amazing friendships formed along the way mostly in my first year and now. And the bits in between; faithfulness through lonliness, through self-imposed lonliness and simply London lonliness.

For great oportunities to share the gospel through CU, with my housemates (who continue to break my heart), with randoms, tutors and lecturers. For the exciting, direct answers to prayer and prophetic, to the mundane day-in-day out relentless words that appear to go nowhere.

For my wonderful church that has taught me about community, taught me about loving others well, for loving the unloveable. For teaching me more of the carasmatic and keeping me safe. For being patient with me and teaching me of grace through their actions, their honesty, their lives.

For my brilliant degree that has increased my mind, given me a love for the untold stories, for opening my eyes to ways of seeing and knowing things that are grey. For coming to an understanding that their is no truth in lived expereince and not having to give up beliveing there is truth passe. For over the 3 years being able to pick through theory, to critique, to enjoy and to come out more in love with Jesus, despite seemingly anti-God ideas. For tutors and lecturers who have been inspiring and have listened to me, encouraged me and given me confidence in my ability.

For Pod; his love, his care and thoughfulness. His genuine desire to help me grow in grace and become more like Christ. His deisre to love me better. For his growth, for his perserverance and committment to the relationship through hard times. For his speed to repentence, his desire to love Jesus more and grow in the gospel. For all being with him has taught me about my selfishness and my inability to love well without miracles. For the fun, the knocking off rough edges, the chats, the tears, the laughs, the growth.

For a love of the martial arts and the communities and friendships that bought, for being able to use my body in ways I'd never thought I could.

For all these things and more I am so grateful to God. For a three years of stretching my mind, body and soul, for growing in grace and in the gospel. For bringing me through, for teaching me, for being patient, for bringing some amazing people into my life to speak the hard words, the soft words, to love and to care.

Grace and faithfulness.

How sweet the Name of Jesus sounds
In a believer’s ear!
It soothes my sorrows, heals my wounds,
And drives away my fear.

Dear Name, the Rock on which I build,
My Shield and Hiding Place,
My never failing treasury, filled
With boundless stores of grace!

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